荔枝视频

Danial Jamal says his idea didn鈥檛 start with extensive research or an elaborate plan, rather it began with the desire to better understand what he describes as 鈥渢he things men carry with them, what they hand down and what they hide.鈥�  

The 荔枝视频 alum observed that many young people replicate the cycles of harm they witnessed at home, leading to a situation where, as he puts it, 鈥渉urt people often hurt people.鈥�  

鈥淚 kept wondering what helps men break those cycles and build new ones,鈥� says Jamal, BSW'25. 鈥淭hat question became the starting point for everything that followed.鈥� 

With a wisdom that belies his age, the recent Bachelor of Social Work graduate began thinking about creating spaces where men could more easily express themselves, realizing that the usual research settings aren't conducive to the ways in which men naturally open up.  

鈥淵oung guys are simply not going to sit around in a circle and start discussing their feelings about masculinity and fatherhood,鈥� Jamal says. 

鈥淚t鈥檚 not going to happen.鈥�  

In a moment of inspiration, he looked for an activity that would create a non-threatening space where young men could come together and unselfconsciously share their feelings around what it meant to be a man and a good father.  

As sociologist Harry Brod鈥檚 research has explored, men are far more likely to open up about personal or difficult topics when positioned side-by-side. As it turns out, the kitchen 鈥� learning to create delicious food 鈥� was the perfect environment.

A recipe for change?

Men come together in U荔枝视频 residences to learn more about how to make delicious spicy chicken tacos, and to discuss what masculinity and fatherhood means to them.

鈥淢ay I please...鈥� 

Jamal started with friends from his community, mostly young Muslim men, with whom, he says, he鈥檚 most familiar with. He was astounded by the results.  

鈥淚t was amazing,鈥� he says. 

鈥淚 started with some of the topics I wanted to discuss, but I framed the topic as a series of questions. For example, 鈥榳hat are five traits that should define a man?鈥欌��  

Almost unbidden, the men began unloading some of their deepest feelings about what being a man means to them, or what being a father might mean to them. 

It often revolved around the ways they wanted to be different from their own fathers. 

鈥淲e also have rules, which I think helps,鈥� explains Jamal, who worked part-time in commercial kitchens over his university career.

鈥淔or example, if you want to get someone鈥檚 attention while we鈥檙e cooking, you have to say, 鈥楳ay I?鈥� That comes from restaurant practice, where people are often handling hot food or holding sharp implements.

"So, people working together in the kitchen are trained to say things like, 'Chef, may I grab that pot?鈥� or whatever it is, out of respect."  

As it turns out, this simple convention introduced a formal civility, which also lowered the temperature and even trickled down into the young men鈥檚 relationships outside the afternoon cooking classes.  

鈥淭he mother of one of the participants actually contacted me,鈥� says Jamal with a chuckle. 

鈥淪he told me her son started saying, 鈥楳ay I?鈥� at home when speaking to her and that he doesn鈥檛 yell much anymore. 

"Instead, he begins every conversation with, 'Mum, may I?' It made their dynamic better.鈥�  

An expanding cooking circle  

Emboldened and energized by the amazing success of his first few cohorts, Jamal began to expand the classes outside his circle to include anyone interested, and there was a lot of interest. 

As the cohorts grew, he coached his friends on how to be good facilitators, and soon found the original positive experience was replicated over and over again.  

Before long, he was approached by by the U荔枝视频 Sexual and Gender-Based Violence Prevention and Support Office and U荔枝视频 Residence Services to create programming for the residence community. 

The two groups have a long-standing partnership focused on bringing sexual and gender based violence prevention education into residence and had been discussing the potential for a healthy masculinities group in residence. Jamal's programming seemed like it would be a great fit.

They provided him with enough funding to hire a few of his friends and past participants 鈥� Youssef Elsabban (), Abdelrahman Alramahi (), and recent grad Amr Gohar, BSc'25 鈥� to be facilitators and the expanded program immediately took off.  

鈥淎s soon as things started picking up with the program, I knew for it to continue to flourish and be impactful, it had to be in the hands of other men,鈥� says Jamal, who is currently working with the as an inclusive governance co-ordinator in its Indigenous, Local and Global Health Office. 

鈥淣one of this would be possible without those three guys being the true leaders of this program. They like to call me 鈥楥hef,鈥� but I like to call them 鈥楥hef,鈥� too. 

"It鈥檚 been an amazing success and absolutely exceeded all my expectations!鈥�  

That success has led to inquiries from other groups looking to expand the program into the populations they work with, as well as Jamal鈥檚 interest in continuing to scale and adapt it for other communities.  

Creating a 鈥淟asting Place鈥� 

Jamal says his inspiration was fuelled by critically-acclaimed English hip hop artist and poet Loyle Carner, whose songs, like A Lasting Place, provided the beacon for his work. 

In that song, says Jamal, Carner articulates the true strength of a good man and a good father who becomes a permanent foundation for his family: "What kind of man admits his failures/turns over his heavy stones/Stands at the feet of grief and wanting and does not turn away?/What kind of man becomes a father/A lasting place.鈥�